Any advice about becoming a parent to a teenager?
Mulder asked:
My 16 year old brother is gay, he came out to our parents and they kicked him out. I let him stay with me and decided that he should live with me, I talked to our parents and they are giving me custody. I told him and he couldn’t be happier, any advice for a new parent? tomorrow we’re going shopping, so he can get stuff for his new room. any other ideas on what i can do to make him feel safe and at home?
Dominic
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My 16 year old brother is gay, he came out to our parents and they kicked him out. I let him stay with me and decided that he should live with me, I talked to our parents and they are giving me custody. I told him and he couldn’t be happier, any advice for a new parent? tomorrow we’re going shopping, so he can get stuff for his new room. any other ideas on what i can do to make him feel safe and at home?
Dominic
December 31st, 2011 at 1:51 pm
Riley
Stay in India, it’s better for both of you.
January 1st, 2012 at 5:39 pm
Nevaeh
My best advice to you is to be his friend, and don’t treat him any different than you used to before he told you he was ***. I am sure it has taken him a lot to come out and tell everyone that he is *** and living a new lifestyle. Just make sure he knows that you support his choice and you are there for him to support him. Those words alone will make him feel comfortable with you and he will know there’s an open door if he needs one.
January 1st, 2012 at 6:59 pm
Lucas
Try to be more of a big brother than a parent. That’s your role, but you are going to have to step it up a notch. Also remember that he is 16, in some ways he’s very grown up, but in other ways he’s stil very immature and these changes might be really hard for him to deal with. Just be there for him.
January 3rd, 2012 at 5:07 am
Benjamin
Awww, poor kid. You’re parents are very cruel. They should understand that he finds men attractive and they should have nothing wrong with that. Try as hard as you can to make him feel welcome, and comfortable. Try to be able to talk to him a lot and have conversations. Maybe you could say stuff like:
“How was school today?”
“Is there anything I can get you?”
“What would you like to do this weekend (if you’re both free)?”
January 4th, 2012 at 12:50 am
Christopher
good job on accepting him as he is!!! u seem to be an awesome parent already!!! he may just be going through a “phase” but if he was willing to go along w/ getting kicked out, hes probably telling the truth. let ur yes mean yes, and ur no, no. set gudlines in the begging. say, i let u stay w/ me, but there ARE rules. he should agree! uve been an AWESOME brother! maybe his fav. foods, and just make sure to ALWAYS tell him how much u
January 5th, 2012 at 3:46 pm
Logan
At 16, he still needs structure and rules in his life. You probably don’t need to act like a **** toward him, but you can’t just be his buddy anymore, either. Set some reasonable ground rules (regarding homework, dating, curfews, chores, etc.) and stick to them.
Make sure you’re always there for him if he needs to talk, but leave him alone if that’s what he wants. Make sure he knows you’ve got his back.
Best wishes.
January 5th, 2012 at 11:43 pm
Nevaeh
Just treat him how you always have and make sure he feels comfortable talking to you about anything. but also make it clear that it is your house and you are responsible for him now so that doesn’t mean he can go crazy, because it’s YOUR **** on the line now. Overall, I would just say to relax and have fun for the next two years.
January 9th, 2012 at 2:08 am
Adam
i think by doing what you’ve already done will make him feel safe and at home. Just protect him from stupid people who are going to **** him just because of his sexuality. Let him know that you are still the same big brother he had before he came out, and he’s still the same little brother you had.